الأحد، 28 أكتوبر 2012

for couples

How to Get Your Husband Back And Keep Him


Relationships take work, and that work must be on the part of both involved. However, it is possible that over time, people change and the dynamic of a relationship can shift. For a woman, if she finds herself in a place where her husband wants to distance himself and raise questions about the relationship, utilizing these few helpful tips will show you how to get your husband back and reestablish the foundation of your relationship.

Identify the source of the problem

First and foremost, the source of the problem needs to be established. Questions such as "are they emotional and/or physical problems" can help distinguish if there is even a foundation for reconciliation. Determining the reasons for a separation also assists in determining if there is a chance of mutual effort and communication on both parts.

For instance, a woman can inadvertently neglect her husband. Work, children, and other priorities of life can cause her to take her husband for granted and create feelings of resentment, hurt and neglect. Men do not always cry or "reach out" to show that they are hurt by a situation. Sometimes those feelings are expressed using anger or acting out in other ways that could irreparably hurt the relationship.

That said, if you evaluate your situation and you feel you've been neglectful to your man, take action to fix it. This doesn't mean you have to necessarily clear a whole day to cater to your man, per se (though that's not a bad idea)... especially if you have other responsibilities, such as children or work, that do not allow for that. Instead, try date hours. Set aside a portion of the day that works best for both of you, even if it's unconventional to a typical "date." Anytime of day works as long as it's a time when you both can get away and just be a couple.

Focus on the union

Avoid too much individualism and independence. This is not to say avoid being an individual capable of thinking and taking care of yourself. Rather, realize that relationships must promote togetherness, respect, and appreciation. Just as within a job or outside friendships that require time and dedication, so does any marriage or committed relationship.

Be mindful of what you say

Avoid harsh criticisms and judgment; sometimes women's frustrations of life are misdirected towards the men in their lives, thus causing men to shut down and "check out." Be sure to direct your frustrations where they belong and understand your husband is not to blame for ALL the problems in your life. Use your husband for support... not a punching bag.

Be confident

Most men appreciate a woman with confidence. Insecurity will not be the driving force behind a man staying with a woman, and while most men want to feel needed and wanted, desperation is not how to get your husband back or fix your relationship, in fact, it can drive them away.

Sex... Yes!!

While not the sole foundation of a marriage, sex and intimacy are paramount for a healthy relationship. The level of importance of sex in a marriage needs to be mutual for your husband AND you. Work together to keep your sex life fun and exciting, not just something you do because you think he'll wander off if you don't. When sex becomes a chore it's a major problem for both. Communicate your desires and encourage him to do the same.

Bottom line, there is no one golden key or strategy. Relationships are a series of learning experiences and growth challenges, from the sweet beginnings of a newly blossoming relationship to the monotonous stages and routines couples develop after years of marriage. Keep the interest and intrigue alive, and most importantly, communicate and show willingness to work for your husband.
 
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